These articles are perfect for coaches, counselors, therapists, and a variety of other wellness entrepreneurs.
What Is An Energy Vampire?
Energy vampires are people who tend to prey on highly sensitive, empathetic, and happy people and feed off of their kindness and compassion until they leave them drained of their energy. Research also suggests that while the name sounds fun and somewhat harmless, energy vampires ought to be studied more as they could have similarities with folks who have antisocial, borderline, and/or narcissistic personality disorders (Northrup, 2018). However, energy vampires may also just have low self-awareness about their energy-zapping behaviors, and when made more aware of these tendencies, they may alter how their actions affect others.
Energy Vampire Signs and Traits
You may have grasped a solid sense of some signs and personality traits of energy vampires from the scenarios shown above. Below you will find a compiled but non-exhaustive list of signs and traits that may help clear up any queries you have about energy vampires (Northrup, 2018; Orloff, 2017).
- A lack of accountability. Someone with a lack of accountability will not own their responsibility and will find a way to blame an external situation or stressor for their actions.
- Feeling the need to one-up you. These people like to keep the limelight to themselves. They may often make you feel beneath them or dismiss your problems and create guilt in you by telling you their issues are way worse than yours.
- They’re the center of dramatic situations. Whether they’re the instigator of an issue or someone who took sides, an energy vampire may come to you to play the victim, receive your empathy, and even expect you to find ways to fix the problem.
- Discussions are dominated by them. These talks are not healthy venting sessions but are more likely to be emotional dumping by the energy vampire onto you.
- Energy vampires take advantage of your kind or caring nature by trying to steal too much of your time away or make you feel guilty if you’re not spending time acknowledging them. They may also give you ultimatums.
- Energy vampires tend to be bullies who try to make others feel small. This typically stems from their own insecurities and comes out in ways that dehumanize others so that you can feel just as miserable as them.
- Most energy vampires are looking to soak up your positive energy by killing the mood, criticizing you, or engaging in toxic or abusive behaviors.
- Energy vampires are always in need of validation, compliments, and reassurance from others. They also tend to be codependent in their relationships.
Hopefully, once you’ve read this article, your neck was left unscathed of any bite marks. But more importantly, we hope we provided you with a sharper set of tools to recognize energy vampires and how to deal with the energy-sucking people in our lives. While we may not be able to control how other people act, we have the ability to recognize when energy vampires are attacking us so that we can implement effective strategies to avoid being sucked dry.
- Orloff, J. (2017). The empath’s survival guide: Life strategies for sensitive people. Sounds True.
- Northrup, C. (2018). Dodging Energy Vampires: An Empath’s Guide to Evading Relationships that Drain You and Restoring Your Health and Power. Hay House, Inc.
- Rutherford, A., Harmon, D., Werfel, J., Gard-Murray, A. S., Bar-Yam, S., Gros, A., … & Bar-Yam, Y. (2014). Good fences: the importance of setting boundaries for peaceful coexistence. PloS one, 9(5), e95660.